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Coachella 2019 Records Huge Spike In Herpes

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HerpAlert Reports Herpes On Coachella 2019 Festival Fields 

Initially reported by HerpAlert, the internet’s number one resource in diagnosing the STD, the outbreak was caused by, you guessed it, a spike in sexual activity in and around festival grounds.

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As comprehensive as HerpAlert’s findings look to the naked eye, they only represent a slender sample size of empirical data; the app’s only been in existence for a mere two years.

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Mind you, it’s no secret that festivals and borderline conduct go hand in the hand, especially in the advent of the 21 century. 


The celebrities who attend Coachella aren’t necessarily exempt from the pandemic either, even if they keep to themselves.


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